Gift, Repack, Recycle

One of my vivid memories of Christmas this year is little Tanya (8) bursting into my house and demanding, “Where is my gift?” to the embarrassment of her parents and the amusement of everybody else. This kind of joyful anticipation and acceptance can be found only among innocent children. But the grown-ups?

Giving a gift is expected to be filled with warm emotions of joy and love, a sense of generosity, maybe a sense of nervousness about the recipient’s reaction, depending on the relationship between the giver and the receiver.

The receiver is expected to be thrilled, feel loved and grateful, but in reality, what happens is most people do not like whatever they have been given. Even the elderly do not like the colour, texture, and design of the saree given by the relative. Sometimes we prefer to get the bill along with the gift, so that we can return the article in the point of sale and buy something else. Then why all this giving and taking rituals?

Especially in Indian weddings, textile items are purchased for all the relatives, just as a formality. Even during the funeral ceremonies, the relatives are expected to give clothing to the members of the bereaved family. Whatever the intention these traditions were started with, it is time to stop all these meaningless gifts as Times have changed.

As I ponder over the Indian hypocrisy of gifting, I am reminded of a strange Japanese custom. There the receiver is expected to refuse the gift once or twice before accepting it, as it is a sign of politeness in their culture.